It's scary to think how the future is so close yet we're here, all naive and confused at the same time. It's actually frightening to think of it especially of the thought of what may be in store for us. Good or bad, let's admit it, we get constant waves of anxiety every time we think about how it will be like...
I get that kind of feeling sometimes. There are even times when I would just sit and stare at the blank page of my notebook or at open windows. I just keep on thinking of the things that might possibly happen to me in the near future. And when I do, that's where I usually get all pessimistic because I keep on telling myself not to think of the positive things too much because some things might not turn out the way I anticipated it to and I don't wanna feel bad about it. Nobody would want that.
When I think, I don't just think. When I'm having deep thoughts, it's either I've drowned myself in sadness or I got all flooded with euphoria. I let my thoughts wander in my head until I feel completely different from the state I was in. You know, thinking about how the next day is gonna be is like being manipulated by an unseen force. Your tomorrow might be a gift or a curse. I know I procrastinate and make alibis often. But I'm working on it. I may act like this huge bad ass kid who seems like she doesn't care about much of anything. The girl who goes: "Who caaaaaaares!" but hey, I do and I am scared... I am scared of the future.
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