There have been a lot of things bothering me the past few months and to be honest, I've never felt anything like this before. I easily get pissed at people and stuff and then there are times when I would break down for some shallow reason or nothing at all. I was sad to the point where I felt like I was already at the verge of giving up...
One time, the entire class went down for a game of volleyball and I wasn't in the mood for stuff like those so I hid inside the comfort room along with my classmate just to make sure our teacher wouldn't see us and force us to get in the game. We stayed there for 10 minutes, talking about the things that might possibly happen if our teacher caught us hiding in there and in the middle of our silly conversation, our teacher caught us and we were sent to the clinic because our teacher got a little mad so we were exempted in the game. We were made to sit on one of the beds. I was shaking then. I felt a little uptight because I was afraid I might receive a failing grade in PE. A few minutes later, he called us and we five, (my other classmates) stood outside the room where our teacher scolded us. While he was talking to one of my classmates, my other classmate started crying, so did the other one until everyone was crying except for me. My teacher turned his head at me and said: "Why are you guys crying, look at Julie she's pretty calm but hey, I can make her cry too." I stood there in silence because I had no idea what he was talking about. He spoke again and this time, he was asking stuff about my parents and my whole family and right before I could speak, he uttered the words: "Are you happy?" And in that moment, I felt my heart sinking like a ship lost at sea and right there, I drowned myself in tears.
"Are you happy?"
...my head was clouded with bad and vague thoughts.
I became a lot unhappier.
But as the days have passed, the days where I felt like I was never ever going to be as happy as I was before, I slowly realized that pain is just temporary. Of course I was a little pessimistic that time but having that kind of thought sort of uplifted me. Pain is truly temporary. It doesn't last forever. All these obstacles that come your way out of the blue, these are challenges given to you to see how far you can go. Life is unfair. Deal with it. But always remember that there is beauty in everything, even to imperfection. We are all made of flaws. We're all born flawed and that is an impeccable thought. We all have ups and downs in life and if we keep moving, we'll be able to resolve all of them in no time! Just like me... I'm happy now. I've got my friends and family to motivate me everyday although we don't get along sometimes, we still make sure we always have time to converse about how things are...
Although I might often complain about how shitty my day went, I'm still thankful God has proven to me that storms do not go on forever... whatever you do, carry on. :)
